Cupidity - twenty seven, the end!

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Previous chapters here.


Robin showered with him and kissed him, dressed, kissed him again and then left. Angel showered slowly and then wandered about in Robin's robe again, touching things, looking at the art on the walls. It was all modern and abstract.

He explored Robin's library. The leather bag was sitting on the floor, filled with Alberich's books. Angel took them out and sat on the leather chair and smoothed his hands over them, then held them to his chest, which was a weird and stupid thing to do. Eos had stepped in front of her own arrow for Alberich. His eyes got hot, and his jaw ached suddenly.

A collection of things, Rose had called this place. It felt just as she'd said, and Angel couldn't forget how Robin had paid for all this.

In Robin's room, the picture hung dark and huge on the wall and for a long time Angel sat on the floor and stared into the tangled and twisted branches until he saw what was different. There were hard edges in the trees and flecks of broken glass on the forest floor, shards of concrete behind the tree trunks. Shadows changed as he watched, like there were things moving.

He didn't mind it, he'd said. It was true, and maybe that was the problem. He could step into it any time he liked and maybe find Eos waiting. Getting older. He leaped up and almost ran out, slamming the door behind him.

He dressed and sat on his own bed, the contents of his kit bag spread out at his feet. The stupid five grand was looking more dog-eared and grimy than before. Angel picked up the Pez dispenser and put it in his pocket. Everything else he tucked into the drawer in the bedside table.

On the balcony the luxuriant foliage gleamed at him as if freshly polished, which it very likely was. Central Park stretched out below him, a green gem in the towering grey city, and Angel wondered how he was going to bear to live here.

He went down to the 7-Eleven and got Pez to stick in Marvin the Martian's head. The cashier was the same girl as before, with all the lip rings.

"You okay?" she said. "You look like shit."

"Yeah. Um. I was... There was a fight."

"Did you win?"

"Not really sure."

He went to the park and sat on a bench and fed the ducks Pez. No one yelled at him this time, though more than one person glanced his way. He wondered how bad he really looked. There were no bruises, or none he saw when he looked in the mirror.

He was still there hours later when Robin sat down beside him. The sun was setting. He could see shards of pink and orange reflected on the lake. Robin touched his shoulder and said nothing.

"Good day at work?" Angel asked him.

"I've been looking over some things. It might be prudent to sell the jet and the yacht. If that's all right with you. I didn't really comprehend how much it cost to keep them up."

"Why're you asking me?"

"That's the other thing I did today." He put his briefcase on his lap and pulled some papers out. He handed Angel a pen. "Sign here."

"What? No. Why?"

"Because you trust me."

Well, that just wasn't fair. Angel lasted about ten seconds under Robin's steady gaze before he picked up the pen. He signed in a bunch of places, initialed in more, until he reached the end of the thick stack of paper.

"So? What was it all?"

"Half of everything I own."

Angel shook his head and stared. "I don't want-- Why would you do that?"

"It seemed like the right thing to do. I don't want you to have to worry, ever."

He wanted, badly, to make Robin take it all back. Rip up the papers. Something. It made him worry more, not less, like he was responsible for something now. And when he looked at it that way, maybe he should keep it. He couldn't expect Robin to just take care of him forever. Not when Robin needed taking care of nearly as bad as he did.

He nodded. It was very close to dark now. Shapes lost their edges and turned blue and shadowy. Everyone who passed looked like one of Rose's women.

"I am different," Angel whispered. He looked down at his hands. "I don't know if I can stay here. In the city."

"We can go wherever you like." Robin paused. "I have business in Utah. We could stay there while the penthouse sells. And perhaps..."

"You better not be taking this where it sounds like you're taking it." Thunder growled in the distance, barely audible over the traffic noise. Angel shivered and wrapped his arms around himself.

"You have met my family."

"Not like I had a choice."

"All the same--"

"They'll hate you. They'll hate you just because you're with me."

"So?"

"What do you mean so!"

"It doesn't matter what they think of me. I'd just like to meet them. But if you really don't want to, we needn't go."

"Why would you want to?"

"Because they're part of you. Don't you understand me better, having met Eos and Alberich?"

"You're nothing like them!"

"Well, I am. But that doesn't matter. Whether I am or not, whether you are or not, our families are part of us."

Angel wanted to argue with that, but he couldn't. Even leaving his own family out of it, Rose had called him brother, and Eos was part of him in an uncomfortably literal way. He could still taste her blood at the back of his throat, and he wondered if that would ever go away. And if he thought about it like that, surely his own family shouldn't scare him anymore.

"Okay. If you really want to. Just--I don't know. Don't leave me alone with them."

"Not for a second." Robin took his hand, thumb smoothing over his palm. "Are they so bad?"

He thought about what Alberich had said and remembered his mother crying for Neil after he left. "I don't know anymore. I don't know shit. I want to go home and I don't even know where that is."

"Maybe I can help you find it. As you've helped me."

It made Angel smile, despite everything, despite himself. "Yeah. I guess maybe you can." Or have already. He didn't feel quite ready to say that part out loud yet. "It's not like in the movies, you know."

"What isn't?"

"The whole happily ever after thing."

"Ah, I see." Robin was smiling. "And what is it like?"

Angel looked down at their joined hands, weirdly embarrassed to meet Robin's eyes. "Maybe... Maybe it's just like this."

"Well, you'd know best, I'm sure. It's not as if this is some sort of fairy tale."

Angel snorted and elbowed him gently in the ribs. Robin settled against his side. There was quiet for a few minutes.

"May I ask you a question?" Robin said.

"Shoot."

"Why did your brother leave home?"

"Oh." It was funny, but he'd never told anyone before. Everyone at home already knew and no one here cared. "His girlfriend Sam--Samantha--she got pregnant. And he helped her with the money for the abortion and stuff. And Dad was just... He was awful. Her parents were bad too, but Dad was worse. They ran away together. I don't blame them really. I just wish... He could've sent a postcard or something," he finished, in a mumble.

Robin put an arm around him. "You believe they're still together?"

"I think so. It was kind of love at first sight. You hardly ever saw them apart." They'd made quite a sight, too, with Sam clocking in around five foot one, and Neil over a foot taller, his hair dark and hers as red as Angel's. When the three of them had gone out together, everyone had assumed he was Sam's little brother. He smiled, remembering.

"Good. That will make them easier to find."

"...What?"

"Unless you'd rather not? I didn't mean to presume."

"You can do that?"

"I think it's very likely. I've found people with far more reason to hide than your brother has."

Angel stared for a few silent seconds, wondering how he'd never even thought to ask for this. He leaned close and pressed his face to Robin's neck and squeezed his hand tight. "Thanks. Thank you. I mean. A lot. Yes, please."

"You needn't-- I don't need thanks." Robin rested his chin on top of Angel's head. "I'd do anything for you."

"I know. You don't have to."

"I know that. I think I do, anyway. Now. But even so."

Angel sort of wished he didn't know Robin really meant anything. It was scary and too much, and at the same time it was exactly what he needed to hear. Everything with Robin seemed to be like that; perfect and terrifying all mushed up together.

He wished he had anyone he could talk to about that. Maybe Neil if Robin found him. Or when. With Robin it would be when. Part of the scary-perfect thing. Yeah, Neil should understand. He hoped.

Robin sat back, settling close and warm next to him. "We should give the ducks more nutritious food in future," he said. "Pez will make them ill."

"Yeah."

It was getting dark. In the distance Angel could see the top of their building glimmering against the dusk. People wandered by, fewer of them at this time of night.

"What would you like to do?" Robin said, after a while.

"I'd like to go for a walk in the woods," Angel said.

"Now?"

"No. I can wait. But soon."

Comments

[white-cross-b.livejournal.com]

OMG. I can't believe this is over. I hardly know what to say except thank you for giving this fic to us, for making me look forward to it every day so I can squee with my friends, for making me curse the weekends, for giving me something to think about other than the usual pr0n. This was intensely beautiful and deliciously frightening, not to mention mind meltingly hot. Thank you so much!

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

for making me look forward to it every day so I can squee with my friends, for making me curse the weekends, for giving me something to think about other than the usual pr0n.

I squee with delight that you said that! Honestly, I do. I can't think of a nicer compliment really. Thank you very much for telling us that, and for leaving feedback for us along the long and winding road!! ♥

[whymzycal.livejournal.com]

Yeah. What white_cross_b said.

You struck so many notes here: dark fairy tales, love, danger, mystery, magic, incredibly hot pr0n, and about a hundred shades of I-don't-know-what in between.

Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I have enjoyed myself like mad, and I cannot wait to read more of your works, whether you're writing individually or together. Not that I haven't already stalked your other fics already or anything... *innocent face*

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

As far as I can tell emungere and I seem to have an inexhaustible supply of demented ideas for further fics, collaborative ones or working separately. We do intend to post more here too, I think.

Also! Thank you for your feedback! It's hard to say thank you enough without coming across as completely mad, so I can't actually express how happy all your feedback has made me over the course of the story. It's really helped keep us going! I'm thrilled that you liked all the various elements we put in, and even that we managed to strike all those notes with you.

[avierra.livejournal.com]

This story really bowled me over in a lot of ways, and I will miss reading it every evening. So, while I am glad I got to finally see how things turned out, I am also a little sad it is over.

I do love the way it ended, the "we're together against the world" thing, it was very romantic and bittersweet and yet still hopeful... just yum. And Angel realizing he needed to take care of Robin more than the other way around, YES.

I hope you'll both have more Curious Spells!

ETA: I just realized who Sam is analogous to. That's... awesome (and funny).

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

I just wanted to say thank you so much for all your amazing feedback and comments over the course of the story. You were probably more inspiring than you can ever appreciate and I'm so grateful that you took the time to talk about your reactions to the characters and the plot. I wanted to reply more at the time because some of the comments you left were really fascinating, like pointing out Angel's death wish, which is something I never saw when I first wrote it, but really it fits in wholly with the darkness of the story.

So, thank you very much indeed for every single comment!! They meant such a lot to us (and I am sure emungere won't mind me speaking for her!).

[giving-ground.livejournal.com]

Oh, wow. I'm so, so impressed with this story, and it's been absolutely amazing to get to read a bit of it every day -- you've spoilt us rotten, to be honest. *g* Thank you both SO much.

*_*

I think I'm going to have to re-read it all in one go at some stage in the near future. :D

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much. I'm just very pleased that you enjoyed the ride! It was hard work posting every day, but it was definitely worth it.

[wk-recomend.livejournal.com]

Thank you so very much for this. There's so much to say about it and yet, not hardly enough to be said. The story was so solid and so real and so amazing. I'll miss the updates for sure, but now I can re-read and re-read and re-read to my heart's content. :D

Great job! I look forward to more stuff from the both of you (individually and together :D)

D

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much indeed. It's been so great to get all your comments along the way and I'm very glad to know that you've enjoyed it.

...'It's not as if this is some sort of fairy tale' *snicker*

[jiele.livejournal.com]

*is happy/sad it's over...muchlove!*

^^

<333333333333adinfinitum

Re: ...'It's not as if this is some sort of fairy tale' *snicker*

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Yes, that's pretty much how we felt too, sad it was over and happy to actually finish it. I'm very very happy to know that you enjoyed our little story.

[aqua-eyes.livejournal.com]

<3 It's quite amazing to see how Angel has changed. It was such an amazing fic. Really enjoyed reading.

And now I must finish uni work. >.>;

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Thank you!! He changes so much over the course of the story, grows up and stuff - sometimes I wonder how much control we had over him.

[therhoda.livejournal.com]

OVER! but but but I am not ready for it to be over.

Ummmm, can we have a sequel? Maybe hummm Jenny needs help or we see Neil?

GODS this was good you two!

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much!!

Maybe there will be some side stories at some point. We did talk about it and it'd be fun, I think. Who knows what they'll have been up to?

[hieronymousmosh.livejournal.com]

*content sigh* That was really very . . . very. I enjoyed the hell out of this story; the characters and the twists and turns - just everything! *MWAH* Gorgeous job, you two <3

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Awww, thank you so much! <333

It's been such fun to write, too. Really it's one of the best writing experiences I've had, ever. I'd glad you enjoyed the results.

[baka-gaijin.livejournal.com]

~ hummmmm of contentment ~

Such a great story! I'm so looking forward to some side stories. You know, just in case there are any. Rose, visiting Robin at school. Robin's childhood life as a 1/2 human in fairy world. Finding Neil! XD

And while we are on my 'wish list', I need commentary from both of you! There has been much speculation as to who the characters in the story might match up to, in the Saiyuki world. I'ld love to know your thoughts on that and... well, so much more. Q&A session! Please?

[emungere.livejournal.com]

I still want to write the Christmas one where Angel brings not only Robin, but Eos and Rose to dinner at his parents' house, heheh. Mayhem ensues. Maybe next year...

And we'll get to those questions, I swear. It's my fault for being slowww. Very glad you liked it, and thank you so much for all the feedback! :D

[indelicateink]

Congratulations! It's such a lovely and incredible story. Thanks so much for sharing it with us every evening!!!

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Thank youuuu!! It was very much fun to write. :)

[chomiji]

Awwww ... I'm so happy for them, and so sorry for us (no more story!), and so grateful to you two! What a wonderful holiday gift you've given us!

If Angel wants forests, maybe they could move to upstate New York or somewhere in New England, where Robin won't be too far away from Wall Street. (And also because I love the Appalachian forests and so I want Angel to see them too.) Someplace with real waterfalls.

And what happened between them physically was so right - it shows how much Robin trusts his Angel now. And I like how Robin was fussing over wanting to give the ducks something more nutritious to eat. It'll be a while before he transfers that concern to human animals, but Angel will help him get there. I find myself thinking of Kay in The Snow Queen, after the ice in his heart has melted.

I really want to give you guys the biggest >HUGS!< You are fic goddesses!

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think they will end up moving out of the city somewhere. Trees and waterfalls and rustic cabins, oh my! Maybe they can keep ducks. And Eos can come visit them. I don't see either of those ending well, actually, but they would be entertaining at least.

Thank you so much for all your feedback throughout the story! It was wonderful to read and much appreciated. :D

[chomiji]

(Oh, and I forgot to say how much I loved Angel's hugging the books and getting teary-eyed ... that big, soft heart of his ... .)

[gen50.livejournal.com]

and now to enjoy reading it in one go.

it was a unique story to read, with faint stirrings of gaiman in the wings
or so i thought, or maybe because i associate gaiman with fairies and things.... somehow..

[saiyuki-ikkou-1.livejournal.com]

and now to enjoy reading it in one go.

Me too! I've been very careful to not go back and re-read previous chapters. I didn't want the story to end, but I was looking forward to that day so that I could go back and re-read it start to finish. I'm sure I'll find things that I missed along the way.

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! :D I have to say that, considering the number of cracked out AU ideas we come up with on a nearly daily basis, it's not unlikely that there'll be another one someday.

[sffan.livejournal.com]

Fantastic!

And yay! (mostly) happy ending. :D

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Thank youuu! :D Happy as they're capable of being, as per canon. *g*

[tochira.livejournal.com]

.....That was wonderful. Thank you both so very, very much-- for the lovely story, and the way in which it was presented.

(And Neil-and-Sam! Oh, I love it! What a perfect way to drop that in.)

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! It was very much fun to write, if a little insane towards the end. :)

[lybra87.livejournal.com]

Oh my. What a journey it's been...and what a fairy tale. Somehow, in a way it ended so much more perfectly than any fairy tale could've had. It's not a happily ever after (which is really just an amusing fiction) it's much better than that; it's good. Just sitting in the park and musing about feeding ducks and things being mushy and terrifying, feeling the here and now; that's all. And that's everything, somehow. Simply.

This is lovely, just lovely, thank you so much! So very appreciated. And any incarnations of Doku and Kou always makes me laugh, and somehow it's often Kou who has to be gender-switched. ^_^ I can't wait to sit down and reread it all over again.

[i-am-zan.livejournal.com]

Hiya! *hugs* Hope you're good and takin' care of yourself.

(sorry Ms Lux and Ms Els. for spammin' yer space!)

[freeradical9.livejournal.com]

"Because you trust me."

*grin* Somehow, after stepping off a cliff to demonstrate trust, signing a few legal documents should be no biggie for Angel at all.

"I'd do anything for you."

There are so many warm and yet bittersweet moments here. So lovely.

If you both do decide to continue this AU (in Utah or the Amazon or wherever), I'm sure there will be many happy fans eager for more. If not, that's okay, too. Thanks so much for sharing the story with all of us, it's been a real pleasure to read. ^_^

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Hee, and I can see Angel winning arguments with that in the future actually--"You never even take out the trash! I jumped off a cliff for you! Jeez."

Thank you so much, we're both very glad you liked it! :D

[i-am-zan.livejournal.com]

There is (apparently) a law of the sea which states that if you rescue someone, it is not the rescuee that should be indebted to the rescuer, but that the rescuer is now responsible for the soul whose life has been saved.

The beautiful thing of this wonderful faerie tale is it is a two way street!

There is so much I want to say about this, how much love and wonderment it is. Instead I shall bask in its light in appreciative silence.

*makes heart with hands*

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! :D

but that the rescuer is now responsible for the soul whose life has been saved

Ooh, that sounds like it would make a good story all on its own!

[emungere.livejournal.com]

Thank you! :D We are both very happy you enjoyed it!!

Ahaha, our writing process. It consisted mostly of one of us not knowing what happened next and saying, "Okay, your turn!" It seemed to work out okay, and was actually much easier than previous things we've written where one of us would do a whole chapter before switching.

the stuff about family. I actually teared up a little during this final chapter. It felt very real and significant - to *me*, so I wondered if it felt that way to you too.

I can't answer for Louise of course, but for me, yes. Probably my favorite thing about Saiyuki is their little created family (not just Our Heroes, but Kou and his people too, just as much). It's the same thing that made me love Firefly so much too. :)

[wedjateye.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Reading this story has been a highlight of my days for the past few weeks. I'm going to miss it. The Angel-Robin relationship evolved in a way that felt so organic, so right. So many moments in this story filled me with joy, or wonder, or sadness. Every chapter was a pleasure. Bouquets to both of you for sharing this wonderful experience with us all.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry about the horribly late reply, but I wanted to say thank you and that I am so glad that you enjoyed it all and got pleasure from it. Really, there's no compliment that makes me more pleased.

[lauand.livejournal.com]

Me, too. I would like to deeply thank you both for everything. There are so many things I loved about this that I can't even start to number them. Thank you the the initiative of writing an awsome AU between the both of you, thank you for posting a chapter a day, thank you for making us feel cherished as an audience, and thank you for this wonderful story that has made us feel with intensity a piece of fiction. That's what writing should be about. For me, it sure it's what reading is about. So thank you, thank you, thank you.

Loved Angel's strange purity, loved Robin's inadequacy, loved Jenny's cynical view of magic, even being a witch, loved Eos, loved Alberich and even if I was not especially fond of her, I loved Rose's role, too. Wonderful style, giving us only the information we needed, those wonderful, short sentences. Those tiny details that made the characters be just like I could be in that situation. Wonderful sex scences, after reading so much porn, one can get jaded from written sex (sometimes I skip that part in a fic when I see it's a standard lemon scene because I can't believe in them anymore), but yours were different, demanding to be read, and so hot... I still admire the way you introduced supernatural themes and it still felt real, well thought and credible. And the way you handed feelings, so subtle but so damned intense. And, above all, I love how they still doesn't completely fit together, how everything isn't perfect even if the danger is over. It's a happy ending, but it's not perfect, it's just real.

You really make me happy every time you post a story... I just lack words. So thank you, once again. Thank you.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much indeed for your kind words! I'm so sorry my reply is so late, but I have come back a number of times and read your comment, just because it made me so happy.

I was particularly happy with the ending too, because it's not like anything is solved very much, but they are still together and they have a future. I like reading stories like that, mostly because it so good to fantasise and imagine what happens next.

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

Aww, thank you very much! I'm very very glad you enjoyed the ride, as it were.

[saiyuki-win.livejournal.com]

I can't believe its over! *really sad* ... I'm so going to miss this.

I really like how you ended this. Everything ended perfectly. Especially when Angel said that everything with Robin seemed scary and perfect but Robin said what he needed to hear. That sums up a lot of things in this story itself.

I don't know what will happen in the future, but you know that they will be alright. (I so feel like Jenny now) That. Is perfect and terrifying summed up together.

The sex in the previous chapter was hot and bittersweet in a way. At that point, somewhere in my heart i fear that Angel will leave again... (though i would never think they would ever get separated again) With Robin's resolution to let Angel do want he want, he might even let him leave him. (then again, i don't think he can resist not following Angel and bringing him back, secretly follow and protect or something. Robin can't leave without Angel)

There's this strength that Angel got after the ordeal, (maybe it's the power surge) that's changed him... =x Without that change, I'm quite sure somehow he might have left Robin at the end of everything. This chapter tells a lot, with an reenactment of Robin leaving for work and Angel feeding the ducks. A comparison between Angel then and now is WOAH *laughs* Angel's quite charming now XD *grins*

Jenny's fortune gives us a glimpse of the future no? =) That's like good enough really. I'm happy for both of them. Collection of things => Home. Why not?

Congrats for completing this wonderful story! Thank you for this journey, its bittersweet to know that it's the end. I do look forward to both of your individual and also collaboration works! Thank you so much!!!



P.S. I know sometimes it's best to leave the story like that. (it really ended the best possible way) It's just bad for readers to be addicted and want more. (Greediness may spoil the all so perfect ending)...

But.... *puppy eyes* *____*

.. if not a prequel, can there be like surprise chapters during different festive seasons to show how they are doing? Can be a drabble*_* maybe not even with sex *_*

Okie. I'm greedy!

[louiselux.livejournal.com]

They will be all right! Eventually, I guess. I think so anyway.

I love your idea of Angel leaving and going off to do his own thing. Maybe it's because he's matured and changed quite a lot since the beginning and is more his own man now, rather than a boytoy. I can imagine him going off too, actually, and Robin not seeing anything wrong in following him - at a distance obviously, to keep track of him. Possibly waiting for him to come back. Gah, I do love that idea so much.

Thanks so much for you lovely feedback and thoughts on them all - it's made us so happy during the writing process.